“O LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am! Behold, you have made my days a few handbreadths, and my lifetime is as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath! Selah Surely a man goes about as a shadow! Surely for nothing they are in turmoil;
man heaps up wealth and does not know who will gather! – Psalm 39:4-6
“O LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days.”
Tomorrow, I will turn the ripe age of 40 years old. I have over the course of the previous weeks, and even months been meditating on my life and the course ahead. My past is one of rebellion and ignorance. I lived for myself. I lived for materialism. I lived in the world and wanted the things of the world. Yet, these things, these shallow pursuits brought nothing but pain and emptiness. Now, as I turn to a new chapter, I look ahead. I know that I am at the half way point of my life. I also now that life is not promised the next day, even the next hour. I am truly grateful that the Lord has given me breath. That He bestows upon me a heartbeat in this life to see His mercies and grace. Things of which I am not worthy to have.
Yet, now, I look to be a humble servant. I look to use what time that He has has granted unto me to serve Him and Him alone. I desire the work of a teacher, to handle His word and deliver it so. That is the zeal that sits upon my heart. I also desire to loving and godly husband to my wife. I must admit, there have been times when I looked to myself and not the cares of my wife. I look not myself but to Christ. To die to self. To carry the cross. That is what I truly desire with my heart and nothing more.
I am thankful to Nate Pickowicz, Mike Abendroth, Justin Peters and others who have trusted me with the task of designing their book covers. I am grateful that they have allowed me to make use of this creative gift that God has given me. I pray that I can continue to make use of this gift to glorify God and not myself.
I am thankful and may I glorify God with the years that remain granted unto me.